Monday, 28 December 2020

Things I Have Stopped Apologising For


It was a couple of months back, when I reached a realisation that for far too long, I have been a people pleaser and from that very moment I realised that something needed to change in my life. Honestly from the moment that everything just seemed to click into place, everything just sank into place and I seemed much happier with myself. I have been working on myself now for quite some time and I realised that one of the big changes that I had to make to my daily life was that I had to stop apologising for some of the things that I do and I thought that I would tell you today why I have made the decision to stop apologising for these things.


Saying No to Friends and Family. The true people pleaser in me would always say yes to absolutely everything and it was tiresome to say the least. I am an introvert through and through, so the things that nourishes me the most is taking time and actually saying no to social events. I can remember last year there was a time when I didn’t have a free weekend on my calendar for around 12 weeks and I bloody hated it. I now say no and it is liberating!


Feeling Deep Emotions. These last couple of months, since I actually started to function more like a normal person, I have got lots of deep emotions which I normally try to compress because I don’t want to seem like an overly emotional person, but why am I doing that and for whose benefit? I now allow myself to feel the things that I want to feel and I am not apologetic for doing so. I absolutely love it and it makes me so much happier!


Not Liking Something. For so many years, I would tell people that I liked something in order to appease people and stay on their good side. The thing is that these days I don’t really give a shit if I am not going to stay on somebody’s best side for sharing my honest opinion. Obviously, there is a line between being honest and being hurtful, so there is a way to do this where you stay on the same side as being respectful. It is truly liberating through to say the things that you mean.


Wanting to Do Things Alone. I love spending time by myself and I feel like it is something that people find a little bizarre about me. I know that most people do enjoy the company of other people, but I am somewhat of an introvert, so I have embraced doing more on my own. Every now and again I may plan to go on a nice country walk around where I live and people will try to invite themselves along with me and I have to politely remind them that I want to be on my own.


Changing My Mind. So many times, in my life I have had comments from people for changing my mind. Whether it is over something small and trivial or a big decision, you can get negative comments or judgement from people for changing your mind at any point. It is in our human nature to change your mind and try to grow and develop. I do not see myself generally as an indecisive person, but every now again I may change my mind and that is not something to feel apologetic for.


Ending Friendships. The older that you get, you realise that there are people in your life that you no longer need in your life because they do not provide your life with anything positive. You absolutely 100% do not need to be apologetic for cutting people out of your life that no longer give you any sustenance in your life. Make positive changes to the people in your life and make changes where necessary. I have culled my friendship group considerably and I am so much happier for doing so.


Looking After Myself. You know what, every now and again I want to shut myself away for the world and give myself a pamper evening and I don’t think that needs to be commented on by a single other person and you do not need to be apologetic for doing something that you want to do in order to make yourself a better person. This for me is normally shutting myself away, having a good old pamper evening, eating crap food which is normally and Indian takeaway for me and watching whatever I want on the TV!


I hope that you guys liked this blog post and if you are a little like I used to be, that you feel like you can make some of these changes. We have the right during our life to be unapologetically ourselves and we never have to apologies for doing something that we want to do and pleasing ourselves. It was an adjustment for me and I kept having to pull myself to one side and giving myself a good talking to, but I am so glad that I stuck with it because I am just much happier with myself now and it has made me a much more confident person overall. Make sure to leave me a comment down below and let me know where abouts you are and if you are unapologetically yourself!


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